Melinda Bozek: Still Living Still Loving
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Facing The Reality of Fallen People in a Fallen World

5/15/2015

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I want to thank Janae Rice for her willingness to come forward and explain her relationship. I want to thank her for explaining her decision to stay committed to our marriage. - Not that she 'owes' any of us an explanation.

So many people feel entitled, even responsible, to intrude into other people's lives. There are some (far too many) who will use the heartache of others to advance their own agendas. This is disappointing. The unfortunate consequence of that is the potential destruction of people's lives in a misguided effort to 'protect.'

The current mantra is 'no more.' 

Of course it would be wonderful if everyone was good to everyone else. Wouldn't it be wonderful if nobody did anything wrong? That we lived in a world where people did not hurt each other. A world where no marriage had no conflict. A world in which every childhood was idyllic. Why, yes, that would be wonderful.

Our world, however, is not perfect. our world is full of people who make mistakes - sometimes horrible mistakes. We sometimes make one bad choice, that can lead to us into habitual captivity. Additionally, a single bad choice on one random bad day can lead to a very tragic event.

To arbitrarily decide that a particularly person is without redemption is to declare that we are all trapped in condemnation. God's word clearly states that we are all sinners. His word also tells us that it is not necessary to live in condemnation - but not without Jesus Christ. He alone is our only hope. Our lives can be renewed and we can live in the power of the Holy Spirit.

Dealing realistically with this fact, and the fact of relational conflict exists, would be far more effective than believing that a 'no more' slogan and  'just leave' advice (and at times manipulation or coercion) is going to eliminate the problem.

A very simple fact is that we love people who are capable of doing bad things. We cannot continue to insult the intelligence and question the motives of women who choose to 'stay with the jerk.' - Particularly when we have no insight into their life.

We diminish the seriousness of the real victims of abuse. We should do all we can to help and protect these victims. We must also be careful not to declare that everything is 'abuse.'  
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